How many days have I got left?

Wasting my life away, one day at a time...

Friday, April 29, 2005

You don't understand a word I'm saying, do you?'s that time again where I havn't made an entry for a while, so I don't know where to start. It's a Friday night and I have school tomorrow (A whole day of statistics catch up) so I don't really know why I'm doing this. Hmph. Oh well.

I had a 6th form interview on Wednesday afternoon, and was so unbelievably scared because this place is very reputable and, uh, elitist. I thought it went Ok though, and despite warnings from some of my friends that there were going to be tricky questions, there wern't as many as anticipated. Whether that is a good or bad thing, I don't know. It felt brilliant walking out of there though, knowing that I didn't have to worry about any more interviews, and could concentrate on doing other stuff. Like wasting lesson time doing drawings on paint. Yeah, I put all my doodley stuff into an album. The album title fits it like a glove.

I'm a little upset also, because my mum wants to give our dog away to some guy. The whole situation is a bit complicated, because my dad isn't looking after her well, and my mum said that she can't live with us anymore. Oops, just realised how that sounded--the dog, not the mother. I'm doing the "pushing stuff to the back of my mind" thing at the moment now. It helps keep me sane. I'm not really sure how things will turn out, but I can only deal with one thing at a time, and trust me, I've got a lot to deal with.

I have a habit of not talking about stuff to anyone. Which is bad, I know. But most of the time, people probably wouldn't understand a word I was saying anyway. Sometimes when I'm walking home and I havn't got anything else to do, I pull apart the bits of my personality and think about all the stuff I should change. The hard bit part is when I realise that I won't be able to do it myself, and that I'm actually still struggling with what I've become.


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